Crushworthy

Ryan Gosling

I'm not really all that into "pretty boys". That's not to say I'm only digging on ugly or "quirky" people. But, I don't seem to like (in a physical way) those guys that 45-year-old mothers would also say is "a hunk". You know, like the Brad Pitt and Tom Cruise types. Or the types that play Thor and Captain America. I'm not a huge fan of big o'l muscles. I'm ok with toned muscles (i.e., you can see they do in fact have the trace of a muscle somewhere in there), but not POW! muscles that punch you in the face. Ok, this is already feeling too ridiculous and I feel like I'm at a middle school slumber party... With that said, I guess one of the few "pretty boys" that make my Crushworthy list is Ryan Gosling. And maybe his tendency to be in indie films (instead of movies where he's riding on a motorcycle alongside Vin Diesel) makes me like him more (despite those muscles). Before he was winning the hearts of pre-Alzheimer's ladies, he was doing an excellent job as a neo-nazi Jew! The Believer, United States of Leland, Half Nelson, Lars and the Real Girl, Blue Valentine...the guy picks some good movies.

I hereby present to you the evolution of Ryan Gosling:

I actually first developed a crush on Ryan when we were both kids. He was on the Mickey Mouse Club. He was part of the cohort that included Justin Timberlake, Britney Spears, and Christina Aguilera. True, I did have more of a crush on Justin than Ryan, but I still had a crush on Ryan. I was boy craaaazy at that age!

I remember those vests...

Then he turned into a scrawny, wiry adolescent (don't we all?). He was on that Canadian show Breaker High where he played an annoying guy. He didn't really do much for me then.

Then I saw him in that movie Murder by Numbers, and he seemed more grown up. He was still a little thing, but his voice was lower and he exuded confidence and charm (as an egotistical teenager that murders people for fun...). Definitely more mature now. And my interest was a little piqued.

Then I saw The Believer and I thought, "Holy shit, where did those muscles come from?" At the time, he seemed so much more grown up in this movie...but looking back on the pictures (in comparison to what he looks like now) he still looks pretty young and not very muscular. But, trust me, at the time The Believer came out, it seemed like a big transformation.

Then when he was in The Notebook and I barely even recognized him. It was like a Barry Bonds transformation.

And then he just got so damn charming and daper.

Not exactly a dapper picture, but I posted it because he's so fucking cute with his dog. 

Oh yeah, did I mention Ryan's halloween-themed band, Dead Man's Bones?


But now he's in this most recent movie with Steve Carell, and he doesn't have a shirt, and he's way too muscular. Disapprove.

Megan Rapinoe

Ok, that Ryan Gosling one was long enough. Like stalker-level long enough. So I'll keep this short. Megan Rapinoe is soccer player on the U.S. Women's National Team. She is an amazing player and had a really great World Cup. She was the one that beautifully assisted Abby Wambach's goal in the 122nd minute against Brazil (in stoppage time of overtime). One of the greatest moments in soccer, in my opinion. She also took (and made) one of the penalty kicks in the shootout at the Brazil game. Soccer-playing abilities aside, she was also quite famous for her hair during the World Cup. And it is indeed quite awesome. Her fantastic soccer skills (yes, that's a turn on), her sense of humor, and her god damn cuteness factor makes her totally someone I would do.