Walls: A Series, Pt. 3

I always love to see what people have on their walls. Here's a look at what's on mine:

(Note: Some pictures are taken at funny angles because I was trying to avoid the reflection of the windows on the glass frame.)

This poster is designed by Jennifer Beorkrem. It's a DC neighborhood map. I love the style, the typography, the different font sizes, and the way the neighborhood names are bunched together within the boundaries of the neighborhood. For instance, the most prominent neighborhood at the bottom of the poster is "Bolling". Very creative design.

Here's a collage of some of my pictures. I put these pictures together because I liked the colors and the textures. Plus, they were all taken in Fargo, ND (well, the last one was taken in Moorehead, Minnesota which is just on the other side of the river of Fargo). They were also on the last roll of film that I developed from my film camera.

Megan Nolton, a local artist, does these gocco prints of a couple under a red umbrella in various cities. I have four individual red umbrellas card prints and put them together (under red paper). And then the individual card print below is a special pink one for the Cherry Blossom Festival.

My friend Denise made this painting for me as a gift. It represents a really special night we shared. That's not supposed to sound as lesbianic as it does... It was just a night that we hung out, but it just turned into one of those really great nights that you don't forget. Flying kites at 1 in the morning and just talking about anything and everything. It was one of those nights where you think, "Wow, I have such an amazing friend. And I'll always remember this night."

An artist from Pennsylvania made this collage. She creates the kaleidoscope-esque designs and puts them on old letters that she finds. I got it at the Hand Made Mart (the local artist/craftsman sale in my neighborhood). The artist was really interesting to talk to, as well. Apparently, she and her husband were professional magicians (I'm not sure if they were Alliance approved or not...) in Las Vegas, but they wanted to have a family and didn't feel that was the right environment to raise a family in (I'm sure the Las Vegas magician community can be real rough and menacing...).

Here's proof of my strange obsession with powerlines and utility poles. The top one was taken in Logan, Utah; the middle one in North Logan, Utah; the bottom one in Willard, Utah (I actually pulled off the freeway to get it).

It's just a coincidence that both of these posters are Jason Reitman-directed films. When Eagan was in Fargo one Christmas, he saw the movie Juno and they had a free Juno poster at the theatre and he brought it home for me. Then with the Up in the Air poster, we saw the movie opening night at the AFI theatre down the street and they happened to have free posters. So I got one. Aside from the free factor, I really liked both movies and don't mind having them on my wall. And then the two purses were both gifts. The top one is a dark blue-green wool purse with gorgeous stitching of flowers and stars. Cheryl got it for me as a birthday present. I saw the purse in Fargo and was admiring it, and she ended up getting it for me. The bottom purse my sister Kayla made for me as a present. It was the first bag she had ever sewn and she did a fabulous job. She had used this colorful asian umbrella fabric earlier for another craft project she was doing and I admired it, and then she ends up making me a purse out of it. It totally sounds like I drop all kinds of hints demanding purses...but, really, I was not expecting these purses as gifts. But I love them so.

I got this awesome print of Johnny Cash by a painter at a Huntington Beach (CA) farmers' market. I really like the particular photograph of Johnny Cash that this painting is emulating, and I felt this painting just added something even more. I like the colors and shades of the painting (compared to the black and white photo). Plus, I like how the painting exaggerates the photograph. Johnny's pompadour is fuller. His eyes and brow are more contemplative, and almost sadder. He looks older-- his face is more carved and weathered. I think the painting is more emotional than the photograph. In the photograph it seems like he's contemplating the song he's about to record -- contemplating how he wants to sing the verse or figuring out a guitar line. In the painting it seems like he's contemplating something beyond the studio, beyond the music.

I got this poster at the gift shop in the art museum in Fargo. They had a special exhibit on Andy Warhol and they had the original Jackie piece.

My Utah calendar. Every year since I've moved from Utah, I have had a Utah calendar. My first year away, my mom got me a Utah calendar at Christmas. I don't think she got it because "Oh you probably miss Utah scenery, here's a Utah calendar." I think she just got it because she was giving calendars as gifts to everyone that Christmas. And I really loved having that calendar. I did enjoy seeing the Utah scenery that I missed. And it kind of felt like a piece of home. After that, I specifically requested Utah calendars every Christmas. And I've had a Utah calendar on my wall ever since. And god damn it is a beautiful state. No denying that. Oh yeah, and if you noticed in the picture, I still cross off each day of my calendar at night -- like a little kid crossing off the days until summer vacation or their birthday.

This is a local photographer, Matthew Parker, that makes gorgeous photo collages. He takes a ton of detailed photos of an object or event and then he assembles/stitches the photos together. The above collage is made up of pictures taken at sunrise and sunset at the Cherry Blossom Festival.

Back-Handed Love Songs & Other Thoughts

Back-handed compliments can even appear in love songs. There are certain love songs that when you listen to them you experience this: "Oh those are sweet lyrics...wait, what did they just say?!"

For instance, The Beach Boys song "God Only Knows". God only knows what I'd be without you. That's sweet, right? And it's good that they sing that line so much because the other lines could use a little more finesse. For example, the song starts out with "I may not always love you..." and you're thinking 'What kind of love song is this?' But then they finish, "But as long as there are stars above you, you never need to doubt it. I'll make you so sure about it." Couldn't they just get right to it and say "I'll love you as long as there are stars above you." Or maybe don't even have a stipulation at the end. Because "as long as there are stars above you" could be interpreted in any number of ways. Maybe just say "I'll love you forever". Or if you feel that's too broad, how about "I'll love you as long as it's humanly possibly" or "I'll love you as long as I'm cognizant and so are you"? Those roll off the tongue really nicely.

In the second verse there's "If you should ever leave me, well life would still go on believe me..." Well that knocks your sweetheart down a peg. Especially with that kind of cocky "believe me". It comes off as very "Oh don't worry, my life would go on without you. Believe you me it would! Yes siree, Bob!" But then they finish it up with, "The world could show nothing to me, so what good would living do me?" Aww that's nice. But, once again, maybe they could have just simplified that down and just said "I couldn't live without you."

So there you go, now the song is "I'll love you as long as it's humanly possible. God only knows what I'd be without you. I couldn't live without you. God only knows what I'd be without you. God only knows what I'd be without you (x 90). " Aww, isn't that nice.

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The best is that old standard "My Funny Valentine". The lyrics consist of incredibly mean insults followed by niceties. "Your looks are laughable, unphotographable...yet you're my favorite work of art." (Nice recovery! I guess...). "Is your figure less than Greek? Is your mouth a little weak when you open it to speak? Are you smart? But, don't change a hair for me; not if you care for me." [My emphasis added]

Ah yes, the classic "I love you as you are...you ugly, fat, dumb person" love song.

And, really, what love song is complete without the singer asking his funny valentine whether she's smart or not?

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Speaking of "God Only Knows", I heard that when John Stamos married Rebecca Romijn, he sang that song at the wedding (yeah, he has a Beach Boys obsession. Sometimes he thinks he is a Beach Boy). Thank god it wasn't "Forever", because that would have been pretty lame. You can't sing Forever to your real wife, when you sang it your TV wife Rebecca Donaldson. I'm sure John thought "Damn! If only I didn't do that for Full House..." Also off limits is skydiving on the day of your wedding and arguing with a sheriff as to whether a tomato is a fruit or a vegetable on the day of your wedding.

Becky's veil means some serious business

Maybe if he could have sang Forever, John and Rebecca Romijn's relationship would have lasted forever. Instead she's with Jerry O'Connell, who probably had no qualms about singing "Stand By Me" to her or even "I Think I Love You" (Scream 2 reference, anyone? Anyone?!).

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Speaking of Scream 2, I hear there's going to be a Scream 4. I hear it has a lot of the original people involved. Wes Craven will direct it; Kevin Williamson will write it; and Neve Campbell, Courtney Cox, and David Arquette will star in it. Let me start out by saying that I loved Scream when it came out when I was in middle school. I grew up watching horror movies (you like how I said "grew up", when at this point in the story I'm only in middle school), and so I liked that Scream was a clever movie that paid homage to the genre. It was a horror movie dedicated to horror movies. I mean, how awesome was the character Randy?

But then Scream 2 wasn't all that good and Scream 3 was even worse. I don't even really remember Scream 3. I remember they were making a movie within the movie (the Scream-inspired Stab). And I remember Scream 3 had Patrick Dempsey in it. This is back when I only knew him as Ronald from Can't Buy Me Love (not to be confused with The Beatles song) and the prostitute pizza delivery boy from Loverboy (not to be confused with the Canadian rock band that had a certain penchant for the weekend). And I remember thinking how weird it was to see Patrick all grown up. It was like seeing a unicorn without its horn (which I guess pretty much means I saw a horse...).

But yeah, that's pretty much all I remember about Scream 3. I don't even remember who the killer was in that one. I could look it up, but why should I even bother?

So I wonder what Scream 4 will be like. Is this just going to be one more installation that makes a mockery of the first movie? The Halloween 3 to Halloween, if you will. Probably. And let's think about this realistically: Neve Campbell is now 36 years old (granted that she played a high schooler when she was 23, but still...). What is the plot line going to be? Sidney already did the college thing. Is she married and with a kid? And she lives in the same neighborhood as Gale and Dewey, who are married? And they have barbecues together? And then the ghost face killer will come back to terrorize Sidney and her family? And then does her child becomes a killer in the end? (Hopefully I didn't ruin Halloween 5 for any of you. It's ok, it was all erased anyway to make room for LL Cool J).

I totally forgot Michelle Williams was in Halloween: Water

And who is going to be the killer in this movie? Like I said, I don't even remember who was the killer in Scream 3. But the killer(s) in Scream 2 was so "eh". Who possibly is left to be the killer, other than Sidney, Gale, or Dewey? Maybe one of them possibly went off the deep end due to trauma. I mean, realistically speaking, I can't imagine too many people can keep their mental health intact after most of their friends/family were murdered, sometimes in front of their very own eyes (at least not through three movies worth. It's time to start cracking, people. )

Elvis's Doctor Wants to Amputate Elvis's Sexy Image

Do you think Elvis was hot? I certainly thought he was a looker. I found myself attracted to this man that was born in the 1930s and dead before I was born. Elvis was timeless. Generations of people found him good looking. And his voice and hip-swinging didn't hurt him either.

Well, Elvis's doctor is trying to change the way you look at Elvis.

Elvis's doctor Nick Nichopoulous claims that Elvis actually died of chronic constipation. He said that after Elvis died he wasn't sure of the exact cause of death, but since then he has done some research on it. He said he didn't realize until the autopsy that Elvis's constipation was as bad as it was. Dr. Nick thinks Elvis's severe constipation could have been hereditary or maybe a virus caused paralysis of the nerves in his colon. Apparently the autopsy revealed that Elvis's colon was 5 to 6 inches in diameter (whereas the normal width is 2 to 3 inches) and was 8 to 9 feet long (with the average being 4 to 5 feet). Ew.

And it gets worse. Dr Nick talks about Elvis's constipation, "He would get embarrassed, he'd have accidents onstage. He'd have to change clothes and come back..."

And worser. Dr. Nick also believes that Elvis's weight gain was not a result of a poor diet and overeating. Instead, he believes the weight gain was a result of bloating due to the severe constipation. He said, "It was really a physiological problem. During the last few years we were going back and comparing pictures, some of them were taken just two weeks apart but he looked like he'd gained 20 pounds when the only difference was that he had a good healthy bowel movement and then lost a lost of weight from that." So, let me get this straight, Elvis wasn't actually fat...he just had 20 pounds of shit in him?! Dr. Nick continued with the sweet talk, "Usually you pass it all in two or three days, but at the autopsy we found stool in his colon which had been there for four or five months..." I better not see that stool on ebay in the next couple of days!

So there you have it.

That sexy thang in the back is Dr. Nick. I know they are friends and all...but is it standard medical practice to not wear a shirt while in the presence of your patient?

At Least TRY to Hide Your Intentions

Soccer (football) is a big deal in Europe. Hell, it's pretty much a big deal everywhere but the United States (and to a lesser extent, Canada). Here's the latest piece of evidence to back up that thesis statement:

Two soccer players on the French national team -- Franck Ribery and Karim Benzema -- are getting in some hot water for allegedly sleeping with an underage "escort" (she was 17 at the time).

Here's the best part:

According to Liberation Newspaper, the police investigation into whether Franck Ribery and Karim Benzema knowingly paid for sex with an underage escort girl has been put on hold until after the World Cup. "We're not moving till the World Cup is over," a police insider told Liberation. "There is no rush. The implications are too serious."

The police are putting off an investigation because they don't want it to hinder France's chances (oh, nice rhyme!) at winning the World Cup next month!! At least try to hide the fact that you're putting a criminal investigation on hold because you don't want these soccer stars arrested and unable to play. At least try to be coy about the fact that you're letting a national sport rule your police work. You could have said, "We're investigating this and taking it seriously. We will not rush the investigation, as this is a very important matter. We're going to take our time with it." Then it sounds like you're working on it all the while, but really you're not going to touch it until after the World Cup. But when you say, "We're not moving till the World Cup is over", that makes it pretty obvious what your intentions are: World Cup Title > Justice.

I like Ribery as a soccer player, and I was surprised to hear that Ribery was involved in this prostitution scandal. Well, not really surprised, I mean I don't really know anything about him personally. Maybe he totally is a scoundrel womanizer (that sleeps with another woman while married with kids). I just know him as a soccer player and as my little Quasimodo. Yeah, I know it's totally horrible that I call him that. Yeah, I know he was in a terrible car accident as a child. It's just my term of endearment for him...

Surely this is not someone that has to pay for sex.

I know, I'm terrible.

P.S. Ribery and Thierry Henry are my favorite French words. And when I say words, I mean French soccer player names. Roughly pronounced Ree-bear-ree and Tee-airy On-Ree. I only watch the French soccer team so I can cheer for those names (while also eating a baguette).

Walls: A Series, Pt. 2

I always love to see what people have on their walls. Here's a look at what's on mine:

(Note: Some pictures are taken at funny angles because I was trying to avoid the reflection of the windows on the glass frame.)

A string of photographs from my old film camera. In most cases, I don't miss my film camera and enjoy having a digital camera -- but I do sometimes miss my trips to Inkley's in Logan. The people there knew me by name. They were really nice people and were actually knowledgeable about cameras and printing pictures -- unlike the Wal-Mart type photo developers. The first picture is the boardwalk at Santa Cruz, California; the second is some chairs in Salt Lake City, Utah; then utility meters in Logan, Utah; a side of a building in SLC which has the remnants of the attached building which was torn down; Bebe in Logan in one her favorite spots; an awesome mural in SLC; the SLC library; and a wall at an art gallery in Fargo, North Dakota.

These screen printed posters are done by a Maryland artist named Jeffrey Everett (he goes by El Jefe). We got these at the local Hand Made Mart in our neighborhood last year (an annual event where local artists and craftspeople set up tents/booths and sell their stuff). This artist, like Leia Bell, does a lot of concert posters and I'm amazed at his constant creativity and beautiful use of color. I wish I knew how to screenprint...

Some of my pictures.

The first picture is a glass atrium roof (and its reflection) at Simon Fraser University. The second is one of my favorite buildings in Vancouver, and how perfect that it's on Heather Street. The third is table and chairs and their shadows on the patio at a coffee shop in Seal Beach, California. The fourth is a telephone pole on Commercial Drive in Vancouver.

Taken in Vancouver, BC. I stumbled upon this painted-on pedestrian crossing on 4th Avenue in Kitsilano. I love that someone took the time to do this.

The first picture is fall leaves at Sligo Creek Park in Silver Spring, Maryland. The second is a sunset in North Logan, Utah. The third is a building reflected in the windows of another building in DC. The fourth is a walkway on campus at SFU.

Same window, two different views

These little colorful paper flags have gold and silver butterflies on them. I found this in a little hippie shop in Takoma Park (a total hippie neighborhood near here) -- you know the kind, the little shop that sells bumper stickers like "My Karma Ran Over Your Dogma", Buddha statues, incense holders, free-flowing patchwork skirts, etc. The person working the counter usually has dreadlocks and seems to be in another dimension. You know the kind of place I'm talking about. This shop fits right in in Takoma Park. This neighborhood also has a pet accessories shop for "the socially-conscience pet". Not socially-conscience pet owner, but socially-conscience pet. That is so Takoma Park. There's also a toy store that specializes in non-competitive games -- for example, The Ungame. Eagan and I just had to get the couples edition. It's "The World's Most Popular Self-Expression Game. Non-Competitive. Everybody Wins." In case you're wondering how the game is played: you are encouraged to sit CLOSE together (their emphasis), players agree to remain silent except on their turns, the player draws a card from the deck, reads the card aloud and then responds. Then the person to the left draws a card and game continues until time is up (45 minutes to an hour). The cards say stuff like "Tell your mate what you would give him/her if you could give any gift in the world" and "If you were to create a picture showing an atmosphere of love, what would it show?" I couldn't make this up if I tried.

I got this poster at the Smithsonian American Art Museum/National Portrait Gallery gift shop. It was on sale for $7 -- can't beat that. Plus, I love the artwork and the Smithsonian Castle is a gorgeous building. Eagan likes to say that the two individuals above the "O" and "N" (in "Smithsonian") are him and I -- because it's a short blonde girl and a tall person with brown hair. I'm pretty sure they're supposed to represent a father and daughter (and that is one disproportionate looking kid.)

My flower wall. The first and last pictures were taken on campus at SFU (I miss my rhododendrons! And the koi pond with the lily pads). The middle one is taken in Seal Beach, California.

This paper lantern was found at another Takoma Park store. This little shop definitely had the usual hippie-ware (I think that's a city-wide shop requirement), but they also had a bunch of different stuff. They seemed to have everything. They had cute umbrellas, dishes, jewelry, clothing, etc. It was a cute overload. I really had to restrain myself. I ended up getting this lantern and a water-proof tote bag that can roll up into a little bundle-- it has a neat design on it and it fits into my purse perfectly. I take it everywhere. The object below the lantern is a star shaped container/bowl that Cheryl gave us.

Oh Canada!

It looks like Canada will be getting their first pay TV porn channel this fall. I didn't realize that Canada didn't previously have one. But I do remember that a basic cable channel in Canada would sometimes play T&A/SkinEMax type movies at like 10:30 PM on a Friday night. One night I was flipping through the channels and I was quickly startled by what I saw on basic cable. See, in the U.S., our basic cable network channels include NBC, ABC, CBS. Their basic cable network channels include CTV, CityTV, Global. And those channels play the shows that are on NBC/ABC/CBS -- but they mix and match shows. For example, CTV would play the new American Idol episode (a Fox show) and then right after that would be the new episode of The Mentalist (a CBS show), then the new Law & Order SVU (an NBC show), then the new The Daily Show and The Colbert Ropert (Comedy Central). If a new American show came on while I was in Canada, I had no idea what network was producing the show. When I would come back to the U.S., I would have to figure out what network that show was actually on. Wow, I went off on a tangent. To make a long story short, a channel like CityTV is similar to like NBC or ABC...can you imagine NBC playing a softcore porn movie on a Friday night at like 10:30 PM? Anyway, I guess Canadian cable services have had pay TV adult content, but the programming was from U.S. suppliers. So this will be the first Canadian adult channel.

And guess what it's called? Vanessa! (No exclamation mark in the title, I added that. I think if they were to add an exclamation mark to the title, making it Vanessa!, that it would almost be too sexy for Canada). Naming your adult channel Vanessa just seems very...Canadian. Haha. It reminds me of Charlotte from Sex and the City naming her vagina "Rebecca". If I were to turn on Vanessa (and if Vanessa were to turn me on. ohhh yeeeah!), I would imagine that I would see happily married, egalitarian partners going at it for 15 minutes while wearing flannel nightgowns and wool socks, while CBC radio plays in the background (CBC Radio One, of course).

"Get ready, 'cause here I come"

And sure enough, the Canadian Radio-Television and Telecommunications Commission said that Vanessa has to follow industry codes on violence and "equitable portrayals" of the sexes. Oh, I love Canada. Plus, they must air at least 20% Canadian content. In Canada, they have rules like that in the entertainment industry that require a certain amount of Canadian involvement/participation. Like a TV channel has to play a certain percentage of Canadian shows, at least a certain portion of a radio station's programming must be dedicated to Canadian musicians, and for a movie to be publicly funded in Canada at least one of the two main actors have to be Canadian (though I think the Canadian government is actually looking to change that rule to boost their box office appeal).

The requirement to have least 20% Canadian content on Vanessa probably means that there will be Mounties and/or hockey themed porn. Or porn versions of their movies and TV shows, like Corner Ass (Corner Gas). Or good samaritan porn -- I'm sure that's a Canadian fetish. Where the whole movie is just people returning wallets to other people, or someone getting out of their car to stop traffic so that a family of ducks can cross the road unharmed, or someone shoveling the snow off their neighbors' sidewalks ('Yeah! You shovel that snow! Do the right thing! Mmmm!'). I can also imagine a doctor-themed movie. After a patient sleeps with their hot doctor, the patient says, "How much do I owe you? *Wink*". The doctor replies, "Nothing. This service has been provided to you free of charge by our single-payer system. No one should be denied the care they seek."

Oh yeah and did I mention this channel is Montreal-based and is a French-language channel? The English counterpart is supposed to reach the rest of Canada in 2011 (assuming cable and satellite TV services agree to carry the channel). If only 20% of the content has to be Canadian, I assume there will be some U.S-originated content. Now does this mean these programs will be dubbed in French?! If so, I hope a lot of "huh-huh-huh" guttural laughing and "oh la la"s are added. Or will there be French subtitles? Because that would be awesome. That would really class up the joint.

I Knew There Was Something Missing In My Life...

The WE tv network has a new reality show called "Sunset Daze", and it features eight retirees living in a retirement community (I guess the new euphemism is "restricted-age village"?) in Arizona. This New York Times article already has me sold.

Reasons why I need to see this show:

1. It's described as "The Golden Girls" meets "Jersey Shore" -- which is just like peanut butter and jelly, if you ask me.

2. One retiree, Joanne Hauncher, 63, drives recklessly on busy streets in her golf cart. And she has painted-on eyebrows. And she says stuff like, "Rules are made to be broken. I'm too old to be spanked. Wait. Scratch that!"

3. Joanne, at age 63, is considered a youngster compared to her cast mates.

4. Joanne and her friends refer to themselves as the Hos. They're a golfing clique (scandalous!). They have nicknames for each other like Hi Ho, Ida Ho (I bet you can't guess what state she's from. Oh and how perfect would it be if her best friend was Uda Ho!), and Slow Ho (because she had a hip replacement. Is it wrong that I find that funny?)

5. In the first episode there's talk about vibrators and going commando (not wearing underwear).

6. Another cast mate, Gail Liebowitz, a retired New York actress, has bright red hair (the article says it's "candy apple-colored". Great description. I would also just call it "old lady red" -- which is related to, but not the same as, "old lady purple" and "old lady orange"). And her hair is styled in a giant flip that her gay son does for her. He calls the look "Lesley Gore on crack". And that's exactly what it is. Check out the picture. I couldn't have said it better myself.

LaWanda, Gail's gay son, Gail, Jack, Joanne, and Sandy

7. Gail's gay son is also featured on the show (what retirement community show would be complete without a hanger-on child?) . I'm sure he'll be full of zippy one-liners -- like when Gail said she felt the show was going to be a success and she could "feel it in [her] bones." Her son responded, "That's arthritis." I imagine he calls her "Ma!" a lot. On one episode, Gail attends a gay rodeo with her son and becomes friends with two drag queens.

8. Jack Zells, 72, is a member of a local singles club and goes by Mr. Romeo. He has a dirty sense of humor. He wears track suits. On one episode he rides in a stunt plane (obviously set up by the producers) and he experiences projectile vomiting. Another episode features his hernia operation. And apparently there's also footage of him getting out of his shower. I cannot afford to miss these episodes!

9. LaWanda Price, 74, is a dancer and she goes by the nickname "Hot Legs".

10. Another unnamed cast member is an ex-nun (just stop right there, I'm already sold), and she likes to drink and sky dive (you just topped yourself!).

11. Sandy Miracle-Jones (sounds like a drag queen name), 68, is a widow that goes on dates set up by Joanne. She is described as a sassy blonde that drinks a lot. It sounds like the most common phrase uttered out of her mouth is "double pinot grigio."

The show starts tomorrow. Now I just need to figure out what channel WE is and if I even have it. Unfortunately I have never caught any programming on WE -- I guess because all of my wedding show needs are taken care of (and non-existent). The WE airs Amazing Wedding Cakes, Bridezillas, Girl Meets Gown, My Fair Wedding, Platinum Weddings, Rich Bride Poor Bride, Wedding Cake Wars, and Wedding Central Presents. Wow. And then mixed in with all the wedding and baby programming are crime shows: The FBI Files (a show on behind-the-scenes forensic case work), Unforgivable Crimes, and Women Behind Bars. They even have a special coming up called Women on Death Row. I guess babies, weddings, and crime is the winning combination when it comes to female viewers?